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Making & Sustaining New Year Resolutions

man with fireworks

What is a New Year Resolution?

A New Year Resolution is a resolve to initiate a new practice or habit or to carry on a certain act, in order to achieve a certain goal. This typically involves taking a quantum leap from a prevailing state of affairs – habit, behaviour, condition etc. Some of the top resolutions are related to gym, diet, and happiness. Sometimes, they’re also about starting a new chapter in your life – like a new venture, writing a book, relocation etc.

What’s so special about New Year to resolve?

Nothing really. It’s just another day. You can choose any day to improve your life in the desired direction of habit, behaviour or condition. Why wait for a particular day!! A possible answer is that most of the changes we desire are quantum leaps from the prevailing state of affairs. For years, you’ve got dyed in the wool in a particular way of life. While, you’re not happy with it and desire a change for long, but unable to do so, because it involves a quantum leap. Enter “New Year”, with new & renewed hope. It is like a trigger, which has the potential to invigorate your emotions to a heightened state that can propel you to take the leap.

However, at a closer look, it dawns on me that this “New Year Trigger” ends up just being a procrastination strategy. We use this as a procrastination tool to allow us to sit on our haunches in our prevailing unsatisfactory state – just like we do all the time.

I”ll quit my job, once my kids are married.
I”ll go for morning walks, once I buy those fancy air pods.
I”ll start my venture, once the stars are aligned.
I”ll quit smoking, if my wife stops giving me all the stress.
I”ll go for a weight loss program after the festive season.

The list is long. We tend to fool ourselves by attaching the action to an event in future. To wish for something and not back it up with immediate action, is a mere desire. If you attach the inaction to a future event, it is just a trickery, an alibi to absolve you from your inaction. It gives you a certain consolation that you’re working towards your goal, even though you may not; you may be just kicking the can down the road. Nevertheless, the new year resolutions do have the trigger effect.

Why do resolutions fail?

And it is because of this trickery we play on ourselves that we’re actually not serious about the whole resolution thing. I mean, we’re serious about the desire, but not serious about the action.

This happens because of a direct application of Newton’s Law of Inertia – A body in a  state of rest will continue to be in rest, until and unless acted upon by an external force, big enough to change the current state! We are in a prevailing inferior state for as long as we can remember. We may not be happy about it, and we nurture a desire to elevate ourselves to a better state, and this prompts us to take the New Year Resolution. But, the desire is not strong enough to break the inertia to leapfrog from a lower orbit to an elevated one. We may vibrate on our lower orbit for a while, trying to break out, but soon fall back into a listless prevailing state.

If this resonates with you, stay with me; we’ll dig this “Why resolutions fail” deeper and arrive at workable practical solutions….I promise.

Quantum Leap

Imagine yourself revolving in an orbit like a planet around the Sun or electrons around the nucleus. You desire to break out to a larger/higher/elevated/evolved orbit. This will improve your state of health/happiness/relationship/wealth. This is a quantum leap – There is a difference between your current orbit and the desired one which is marked with a different/higher/evolved/superior set of work ethics, habits, lifestyle, behaviour. Leapfrogging from lower orbit to an elevated one needs a change in these..that requires a quantum of energy. How much energy is needed depends on two things:

  1. the deep rootedness of the inertia (the longevity and  ineradicability of the prevailing state)
  2. the gap between the orbits – the desired state and the current state

During the typical New Year Celebration, in a heightened emotional and probably inebriated state, we disclose our desire to take the quantum leap in the form of a resolution. We may vibrate with the desire for a few days. But, within a matter of a few days, as the reality of this energy requirement dawns, the resolution fizzles out! Of course, until next year, when you reach that heightened state of vibrancy again. Alas, the story runs in loops…

“A year from now you may wish you had started today.”

– Karen Lamb

How To Make Resolutions Work?

Since The resolutions are typically made in a heightened emotional and probably inebriated state, they come straight out of the inner subconscious. They are real desires. Let’s see if there’s anything that can be done to prevent them from fizzling out.

concrete building
Build a staircase to the elevated orbit

As I said, it needs a quantum leap, which needs some energy. How much energy depends on the two factors mentioned above. The answer to our quest to reduce the energy required lies in tackling these two factors. To my mind, the first point is a given and there is nothing we can do about it. We’re habituated to a certain orbit for long. We cannot change our past. We are left with the second point to see if we can do something. Fortunately there is a way out to reduce the gap between the orbits. This can be done by building a staircase between the two orbits and taking one small step at a time.

Here, I said it in one sentence. But, let me still elaborate it further. Goals are very important in life. They give you a sense of purpose and direction. However, they, by definition, are long term and quantum leaps. They appear like a mountain to climb….daunting!

You realise your goal by taking one step at a time. This is done by breaking the goal into smaller, less daunting tasks. These tasks need to be small enough to:

  1. look less daunting. This reduces the energy requirement. The challenge looks diminutive and achievable.
  2. show quick feedback/results. This keeps you motivated if the results are positive. If the results are negative, this helps you course correct and minimise the setback. This reduces your stake and prevents you from suffering inaction because of loss aversion.

An example I often quote on this is that of the famous partnership between VVS Laxman and Rahul Dravid in the 2nd Test Match against Australia at Eden Gardens, Kolkata in 2001. As a backdrop, this was a much hyped three test match series, rightly so. India was thrashed in the 1st Test at Mumbai. In the famous 2nd test, India was trailing by 274 after the first innings and asked to follow on. A desperate captain, Saurav Ganguly, promoted VVS Laxman (the only saving grace in the 1st innings) up the order. The other wickets kept tumbling…till Rahul Dravid, “The Wall”, joined him on the crease. What do you think, they would be thinking then. Would it be:

“Let’s stitch a 90 over, entire day,  336 run partnership. Turn the tables around, set an imposing target of 384 and then let Harbajhan spin his magic to turn the tide, win the match and then go on to win the final match and claim the series!”

Or, would it be:

“Let’s play one ball at a time, see if we can see through this session….and then the next”

Chances are it was the latter. They took it one session at a time, one spell at a time, one ball at a time. They batted all day to take India from 254/4 to 589/4 and set up what is arguably one of the greatest comebacks in Test cricket and the greatest partnership in Indian Test Cricket history! This is what VVS Laxman had to say about the partnership subsequently…

After every over, we used to fist pump and the only thing we were discussing, and telling each other was, ‘Come on buddy. One more over’. That was something that was a great learning for both of us because when you are facing a big challenge, you cannot think about the bigger picture. You have to focus on achieving the smaller goals. The easiest goals for us to achieve was to give merit to each and every ball you’re facing and encourage your partner that we got to do this for our country. Rahul was down with viral fever, I was struggling with my back and all we were telling each other was, ‘One more over.’ And as it turned out, we batted the entire 90 overs on the 4th day” – VVS Laxman during a Star Sports Show, ‘Kolkata 2001-Dravid & Laxman Special’

Got goosebumps!?

Back to our own problem of resolutions. Our resolutions are like long term goals, which are daunting on the face. We need to break them down into minor tasks which are less daunting and provide quick feedback. Taking a small baby step towards your goal is far less daunting, less risky and less energy consuming than taking a giant quantum leap. As we get positive feedback taking those baby steps, we get motivated to take the next baby step and so on.

One practical example follows:

You’re overweight, lazy, pot bellied. Forget sprinting full pelt, you can’t even remember when you did that last time. You are probably pre-diabetic. The state of health has started worrying you. You’re worried and disgusted with your current state of affairs. It has taken years of bad eating habits and inactivity to bring you here. You desire to break out of this and get fitter, stronger and healthier. In an heightened emotional and probably inebriated state, you blurt out your deep desire in front of your family and friends. Your fit friend, John Abraham, even invites you to join his Gym and Tennis Club. You agreed vehemently. You also made tall claims to shun all junk food. During the next few days, your family and friend remind you of your “clarion call to yourself”; your fit friend, John, has three missed calls to possibly pick you up on his way to the Gym. The reality strikes. You realise, while the desire was true, you made some tall claims. You ignore John for a few days, bear the jibes from the family till things recede to “normalcy” in a couple of weeks. Back to square one, to the dire, deplorable original state/orbit. Here’s the solution:

Gym and Tennis are a great desired future state. But, it is virtually impossible to get there in a straight shot. You’re deeply entrenched into a deplorable (in your own view!) lifestyle. You need to build a staircase…take a baby step and see the results. Here are a few baby steps that you can take:

Intermittent Fasting – Do not eat anything for 12 – 16 hours. For the uninitiated, this can be easily done by not eating anything a few hours both sides of an 8 hour sleep. This has tremendous benefits. While this shows quick results, it is not a quick magic pill. On the contrary it is a permanent lifestyle change. I posted a Twitter thread on this…

Shun Junk – Junk Food is not even food. It is a calorie dense nutrition scarce stuff that is very convenient to eat – ready to cook, or ready to eat. This gets us hooked onto itself and keeps us overweight and undernutritioned. Simply stop stashing packaged foods in the kitchen. Eliminate sugar. Eat wholesome food, in as close to its natural state as possible.

Stand & Walk – Do not treat walking as an exercise or a morning walk ritual, while you may do it, if you want. Again, make it a lifestyle choice. Stand and walk for most part of the day. Replace sitting with standing and walking…shun the chair!

1 minute exercise – Do not have time and energy for Gym or Tennis? How about a quickie – a 1 minute body-weight exercise – push ups or body-weight squats or surya namaskar or anything you like, or a combination of any of these. Just 1 minute, before you take a bath. There is no comparison with your friend John. You do this as per your current capability.

You take some, or all of these baby steps and watch the progress. Pat yourself for every small success you observe. As you get small success, you will be able to see the next steps on the staircase that you are not able to see today. Maybe you”ll be able to exercise for 15 minutes, or play badminton with your neighbour or replicate the success of your 1 minute bodyweight exercise to 1 minute running. You take some or all of those new steps then and repeat the process. I gave an example of health, but the algorithm of making and sustaining New Year Resolutions remains the same.

“A dream written down with a date becomes a goal. A goal broken down into steps becomes a plan. A plan backed by action makes your dreams come true.”

Greg S. Reid

Wish You a Happy New Year and Good Luck for your New Year Resolutions!